Ridiculously stupid ads & slogans

This time up:
My Top Fifteen dumb ass product ads & slogans

1) That damn Burger King 'King' - face it, that dude is just creepy. Hopefully he has gone away for good. Scariest of these ads? The one where the guy wakes up in bed with the King..... Oh...my....god...!

2) Always : "Have a happy period" -Are they actually serious? Had to be a man devising this dreck. Happy? As if.

3) Can somebody please make the Mucinex 'Snot' go away? Ditto that for the disgusting Lamisil foot fungus creature. Since when do bodily secretions and fungi pass for advertising representatives? Just plain yuck.

4) Geico: ok, I thought the cavemen were kinda funny, and I even like the British gecko.
But the 'real people' who have celebrities explain how great Geico is - now that's stupid.
Like I want to look at Joan Rivers Poltergeist-era clownish persona ever again - or see Little Richard and his creepy brown lipliner for any reason.... are you guys intentionally trying to give me nightmares?

5) GoDaddy's dumb ass Danica Patrick ad. Debuting on Superbowl Sunday, this had to be one of the real bombs. "Hurry everyone, to the computer to see a chick zipping her jacket on (or off). This ad is too risque for regular tv! Run to your monitor. Forget watching the game."
Huh?
As if I care to see whatever it is she's showing. I'm quite sure it isn't full frontal nudity.
And really, who gives a shit? And by the way, what exactly is GoDaddy?
Try telling me that. I still don't know.

6) Speaking of celebrities - the Pepsi ad with Justin Timberlake. Really assinine. And not just cause it's him. Would be equally annoying with someone good looking and/or talented - such as Johnny Depp, Carrie Underwood or pretty much anyone else for that matter.

7) Pepto Bismol's characters line-dancing to a variety of illnesses. Anyone (or anything) getting jiggy to problems with body functions has too much time on their hands. I understand it's a great product and all - but a little ditty about gastric ailments is just.....wrong.

8) Countrywide's endless commercials on getting your mortage refinanced for their low low rate! "Quick! Call now and get a RE-FI as soon as possible! "
I'm so darn sick of that dude - he's aging on air he's been doing it so long. Did his hair gray overnight or what? How about a big, tall glass of shut the f*** up.
Where's the mute button?

9) Why did they have to ruin that Zeppelin song (Rock 'n Roll) by attaching it to a Cadillac commercial? I still can't get that out of my head when I hear that song. And I'm sure not buying a Cadillac anytime soon, either. So there.

10) Lawyers. In general. All the commercials that start with "Have you: been injured in a car accident/taken a medicine that made your head explode/worked in a coal mine for 30 years/got cancer from your microwave/got incurable diarrhea and-or brain damage from eating lead paint/ate a poison mushroom from your neighbor's garden/tripped over your daughter's skateboard" ...etc....etc...
This shit should be banned. It is an endless parade of ambulance chasing and greedy gimme-more assholes. Put a cap on this crap, asap.

11) The Viva-Viagra campaign. Need I say more?

12) Head-On - that headache tube of waxy chapstick type junk you roll on your head and WHAM! Your headache is gone. Sanity has gone by the wayside.

13) Safe Auto. I wouldn't buy this damn insurance if it were $2.00 a month. The mere start of that horrific jingle makes me clamor for my remote and click on the mute. Why can't all insurance commercials be like Nationwide (life comes at you fast!)

14) Absolutely anything that Billy Mays is hocking. Another mute-worthy jack-ass. This guy probably makes more money than the President selling Orange Glo groovy gunk and Oxy-this'n'that. Why doesn't he try hustling Oxy-Contin? That'd go quick. With a free diamond ring to boot.

15) And last but not the least annoying: Wendy's commercials starring the asshole in the Pippi-Longstocking wig. Pardon my language but just what the f*** are they talking about? People diving one after another into holes in the ground like sheep?
Wow, and someone at their ad agency actually is feeding his family by thinking up this rubbish.

Ok, rant over.